6. A Thousand Words (Brian Robbins, 2012)
One of the greatest stand-up comedians of all time, and one of the best comic actors in films as diverse as Shrek, 48 Hours, Trading Places and Beverly Hills Cop, Eddie Murphy toned down his edgy image considerably when he moved to family friendly fare in the late 90s and early 00s. This also resulted in a massive quality drop, culminating in the high-concept yet poorly executed A Thousand Words, easily the worst film of his career.
It was filmed in 2008 but released in 2012, a sure-fire sign that something went terribly wrong along the way. Murphy plays a literary agent with an extraordinary gift for gab who is cursed by a Bodhi tree that appears in the garden. Every words he says takes a leaf from the tree, leading Murphy to pick and choose his words carefully. A decent concept for sure, but the execution was so painful it even lead The Guardian to ask: “ is this the worst reviewed film of all time?”
7. Look Who’s Talking Now! (Tom Ropelewski, 1993)
Before Pulp Fiction had everyone talking about John Travolta’s big comeback, Amy Heckerling’s 1989 film Look Who’s Talking was a surprise smash hit, showcasing the actor’s great comic chops and grossing an incredible $297 million.
It had a simple premise: a woman decides to have a baby alone but is helped along the way by a cool taxi driver. The twist: the baby (voiced by Bruce Willis) can talk! A sequel, Look Who’s Talking, Too which doubled the amount of babies, was ordered straight away and released to mixed reviews, but managed a still respectable $47.8 million box office return.
The franchise should’ve stopped there. It didn’t, with the concept for Look Who’s Talking Now taking things way too far. The kids are grown up and now its the dogs who can talk. Voiced by Danny DeVito and Diane Keaton respectively, it was seen as an embarrassing end to a pleasant enough franchise, only making $10 million off a $22 million budget.
8. Staying Alive (Sylvester Stallone, 1983)
Saturday Night Fever, released in 1977, kickstarted a generation, boasting the most successful film soundtrack of all time, awakening the world to the power of disco and providing John Travolta with his breakout role. Even today the film still holds up as a portrait of escapism and the power of the dance-floor to change lives. The sequel, on the other hand, is a complete mess and only remembered by the most fanatical of die-hard Travolta fans.
Directed by none other than Sylvester Stallone, it sees Tony Manero pursuing his dreams of becoming a professional dancer, searching for his big break on Broadway. Considered one of the worst sequels ever, it completely airbrushed the realism of the original, turning Tony’s life into a glorified music video. Even the dance sequences were considered to be a complete failure.
9. Return to the Blue Lagoon (William A. Graham, 1991)
The leering and creepy The Blue Lagoon imagined how much sex two people would have outside if they were trapped on a desert island, and was dismissed as glorified softcore pornography.
Return to The Blue Lagoon, released 11 years later, but still directed by the same impassioned auteur, William A. Graham, also tells the story of two children trapped on a desert island who must work together for survival, and casts a 16 year old Milla Jovovich in the main role to devastatingly poor effect.
While the first film creates a kind of unintentional comedic effect, the so-called sequel —which functions more like an even more pornographic remake — is simply tedious, giving it little to recommend. Generally considered to be one of the most soulless cash-grab sequels ever made.
10. Jaws: The Revenge (Joseph Sargent, 1987)
Jaws, the film, has been somewhat superseded by what it represented for Hollywood in a wider sense. The great summer blockbuster was here to stay; now films would have to get bigger and bigger in order to keep people going to the cinema. One of the best examples of this trend was the sequels to Jaws itself, which kept trading off the popularity of the original while promising more and bigger sharks.
This trend finally reached its nadir with Jaws: The Revenge, one of the most ill-conceived films ever made. It was nominated for seven Golden Raspberry Awards, including Worst Actor for “Bruce The Shark”.
Spare a thought for poor Michael Caine – also nominated for Worst Supporting Actor — who was unable to accept his Oscar for Hannah and Her Sisters because he was in the middle of filming. He famously said of the film: “I have never seen it, but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific.”